her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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