He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
