Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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