she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
