I need help removing her.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize
