My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
i just google imaged poop.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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