you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
