You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
