It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
