Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
