I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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