I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
