Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
