people are starting to question the shark bite story
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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