don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
