we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
