he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
