No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
