I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
My vagina just clenched in fear
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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