I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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