Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Randomize
