Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
