I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
We talked him into tasing himself.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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