but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I need a beard to bite.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
