I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
