So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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