No awkward lesbian experiences without me
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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