Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
