We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
