But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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