somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
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