im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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