Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He? As in you personified your dick?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
