I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
