Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
