I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
