I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
