just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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