Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I pour the whiskey from now on
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
