It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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