Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
