none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
