I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
