I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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