I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize