The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
He better not be in your backpack
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize
