Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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