Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
When are your genitals available?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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