I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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