It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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